I get odd looks occasionally when I tell people I'm a fan of the art of the television commercial. It requires considerable skill to pack an effective message into a 30- or 60-second block in such a way that it will stick with the viewer and not annoy them to the extent that they not only won't buy your product, but will seek out any store selling it with murderous intent.

It's very important to entertain, but you've also got to leave the viewer with a strong memory of your product. A great example of a popular commercial doing the former but failing at the latter was the series of "Where's the beef?" commercials that ran in the '80s, starring Clara Peller as a querulous older woman demanding something beyond the usual fast-food slop.

Quick, what chain ran the commercial? If you can't remember, you're not alone. Wendy's was the chain, but the product identification was so weak that most people didn't get that impression. The slogan has become part of the pop culture lexicon, but the commercials in the end weren't all that effective. Perhaps if they'd had Clara going into an ultimate fighting cage match against Ronald McDonald and the seriously creepy Burger King ... hmmm ...

And while I'm on that subject, just whose idea was the new Burger King costume? If I was offered food by someone looking like that, my first thought would be that I'd gotten some bad chowder and discovered that those tract-waving goons I ran off from my door last week were right and I really HAD gone to hell, and this was one of Satan's imps come to deliver dinner. With those soulless eyes and that rictus grin, the King doesn't resemble a cheerful fast-food pitchman so much as something parents would use to threaten their small fry into eating their vegetables.

But that's not what I came here to talk about.

This weekend, I saw a commercial that illustrated yet another power of the medium. Dodge, maker of my beloved Kahless (my Ram 1500 pickup), is offering a deal wherein buying a Dodge vehicle will guarantee you gas at $2.99/gallon for three years. There are mileage limitations and other small print, but that's the gist of it. The commercial shows the power these ads have to frame economic reality and shape the way we think about matters that hit our wallets.

Stop and think about that for a minute: $2.99 gas being used as a selling point, not a scare tactic. Five years ago, did you ever think you'd be paying three bucks a gallon for gas, much less thinking of a penny less than that as a bargain? Even after the price surges after Hurricane Katrina, most people thought prices would come back down and stay down, that some sort of sanity would be restored and we'd all drive our V-8 SUVs off into the sunset, air conditioners blasting.

If you, like me, have recently had to weigh whether it was worth a tank of gas to visit relatives (do I really love Aunt Wendy that much?), you know that prices haven't come down. Remember when you were in high school, and you learned the prices people paid for gas around the world? Remember chuckling at the exorbitant prices drivers in London or Paris paid to tootle around in their Jaguars and Citroens?

Welcome to Paris, mes amis. You might want to buy a baguette and some cheese and find a place to sit. It's cheaper than driving.

What the Dodge ad tells us is that these gas prices are not coming down anytime soon. This is not an aberration, some market hiccup that will soon be corrected and allow us to stop spending our house payments to keep our cars and trucks running. This is the new reality.

My prediction: Get ready for the New Age of Rail, kids. With plane fares skyrocketing due to fuel surcharges and driving becoming a luxury, I think we're going to see a lot of old rail lines refurbished, and a lot of new ones being laid. Maglev and other high-tech, low-carbon-footprint conveyances are going to get some serious face time.

Me? I'm buying a new pair of walking shoes and trying to lose enough weight to get back on my 10-speed.

Got a question? Comment? UFO hovering over your petunias? Drop me a line, anytime!