"It is better to look good than to feel good."
-- Fernando Lamas

As famous quotations go, it may not be up there with "Time is money" (Ben Franklin), or "To err is human, to forgive Divine" (Alexander Pope). But then, neither Franklin nor Pope ever had Lamas' tan, number of appearances on "The Tonight Show," or, in Billy Crystal's impersonation, one of the most famous recurring characters in the history of "Saturday Night Live."

But maybe Lamas had it wrong. Maybe it's really better above all to smell good.

At least that's what Kumar Ramani thinks. Ramani is the creator of "Ageless," which is being billed and marketed as "the very first anti-aging perfume." I know this because that's what it said in the e-mail I received last week.

Actually, the e-mail only said that "Ageless" is becoming popular with women because "they are believed to be 8-12 years younger -- no joke!" I didn't laugh. I just stared blankly at my computer screen and thought once again that my company's spam filter really may not be as effective as it should be.

No, for the real jokes I had to call the company's PR representative in L.A., who put me in touch with Mr. Ramani himself in New York. That's when the stand-up routine really started.

"Know why I call the company 'Harvey Prince?'" Ramani asked me. I gave up. "Because my two sons go to Harvard and Princeton!"

Ba-dum-bum. He was killing me. And just getting warmed up.

"People smell old often before they look old," Ramani explained, turning all professorial on me. (According to Ramani, he spent "5-6 years in the beauty business.") "Think nursing homes," he said. "Think rose -- that's a grandmother fragrance."

By contrast, "Ageless" blends fragrances that research apparently pegs as "young-smelling:" pink grapefruit, mango, pomegranate, jasmine and musk. To me, that sounds more like a smoothie than a perfume, but what do I know?

Not much, Ramani assured me, now veering off into more of a Don Rickles thing.

"The Middle East region is our next big marketing push," Ramani gushed. "Think of all those Muslim women covered from head to toe; how do you know if it's man or a woman?"

Pause. "Um, because they're covered from head to toe," I ventured.

Ramani was having none of my party-pooping sober rationality. "No, from my fragrance!"

Oy. Women in burquas can't even leave their homes in some places right now, but somehow they're going to skip out and head down to their local Bloomies or something and stock up on perfume. But wait, there's more.

He was winging back stateside as I asked if any major celebrities were using his new product. "Yes, Sanjay Gupta's wife, and Michelle Obama."

When pressed if the First Lady is actually a customer, Ramani demurred. "Well, we sent it to her." "Don't tell me," I chimed in. "And she didn't send it back ... "

Then, without missing a beat he added, "Hey, I'll send you a link to the interview I did with the BBC -- very funny stuff."

I wondered if his age-defying fragrance was marketed only to women. For now, yes.

But Ramani's got a male fragrance in development -- "Eau Flirt" -- that will be out in three months. No word on how that might go over in the Middle East. I'm already imagining the testers and the Taliban. Now that's funny.

Sometimes those emails you think should be filtered as spam end up proving otherwise. Not that I have any idea if "Ageless" works or not, but I was glad I picked up the phone and did some digging, because had I not spent 15 minutes talking to Kumar Ramani, I would have instead had to make several other calls, including one to a periodontist which I have been avoiding for weeks.

Besides, there's no question Kumar Ramani is passionate about perfume. And hey, who knows? Maybe there is something to the whole idea of smelling younger.

I can hear Fernando Lamas now.

"You ... smell ... mahvelous!"